KidsEditors' Dilemma
A video game given or loaned? His mom wants it back
My nine-year-old came home from a friend’s house with a game for his console. He told me, very proud: “He gave it to me, he doesn’t play it…
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Arguments: kids
Kids are the best thing in the world, and an endless source of disagreement. Screen time. Bedtime. Candy at the grandparents’ house. Homework, allowance, a punishment that seems too harsh or too soft. The friend’s parent who lets them do anything. And the big question of rough nights: whose turn is it to get up this time?
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KidsEditors' Dilemma
My parents babysit for free: my list of rules hurt their feelings
My parents watch my two kids every Wednesday, for free, and I’m truly grateful. But every time, the kids come home after three cartoons,…
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KidsEditors' Dilemma
Our baby has the same name as my friend’s dog: is that a problem?
My partner and I picked a name for our baby. A soft, slightly old-fashioned name we’ve loved for years, long before we ever met the dog in…
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KidsEditors' Dilemma
My daughter’s tablet at a restaurant: is the next table overreacting?
We were at a restaurant with our four-year-old. Service was slow, she was starting to climb on her chair and whine. To get some peace, I…
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KidsEditors' Dilemma
I made my son’s volcano project for him: is that so bad?
My ten-year-old had to turn in a volcano model for school. He started on Sunday night, the night before, of course. At 9 p.m., he was…
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KidsEditors' Dilemma
I take 50 cents from my teen for everything he forgets: too strict?
My thirteen-year-old son gets a $20 monthly allowance. He forgets everything: his water bottle at school, his keys, his jacket at a…
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KidsEditors' Dilemma
Karate carpool: I’m sick of always being the one who drives
My daughter does karate on Wednesdays with the son of another mom from school. At the start of the year, she asked if I could take him “now…
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KidsEditors' Dilemma
A flip phone for starting middle school: am I too strict?
My son is starting sixth grade. He’s been begging for a smartphone for months, because “everybody has one.” I get that he needs to call me…
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These arguments turn into misunderstandings fast because each parent thinks they’re protecting the child. Each one repeats what they lived through as a kid, or deliberately does the opposite. Being exhausted doesn’t help. And when the disagreement blows up in front of the child, it quickly becomes a matter of pride: you have to win, not just decide.
To vote fairly, start from the idea that both adults want what’s best for the child. Read both sides, knowing the same person wrote them. Separate the substance, the rule at stake, from the way it was handled, for example contradicting each other in front of the child or deciding alone. One rule, finally, is not up for debate here: no story may make it possible to identify a child. No first name, no school, no town, no overly specific detail.
FAQ
What should we do when we disagree in front of the kids?
If you can, save the disagreement for later, without the child around. A line like “we’ll talk about it, just the two of us” avoids contradicting each other in front of them. Then agree on a shared rule and both stick to it.
The grandparents don’t follow our rules: how do we tell them?
Thank them for their help first, then explain the rule and why it matters to you. Separate what’s essential from the rest: a few extra pieces of candy at Grandma’s aren’t always worth a fight. Keep the two or three rules that really count.
Can I post an argument that involves a child?
Yes, if the child can’t be identified: no first name, no school, no town, no precise description. Tell the disagreement between the adults, not the child’s life. Stories that expose a minor are rejected.